Its pronounced Ki rai taaa.

Hello, is it me your looking for? I can see it in your eyes, I can see it your smile, Lionel and I wrote that together, well he mostly wrote it.... but it was inspired by my eyes. I like Lionel Richie he's got some catchy tunes, I just wonder why his daughter is so Stoopid. My theory is that Lionel, back in the eighties, used so much Soul Glo, circa 'Coming to America', that it somehow infused into his genetic code and thusly transferred to Nicole.
I'm way off topic, my original thoughts for the day are on old Karate movies, I watched the trailer for the new Karate Kid, and despite every sense of my being knowing the movie is going to be pure coagulated fat from a jersey, I kinda wanna see it. The Kobra Kai can eat shit.
My fascination with Karate/Ninja movies started young and paralleled my porn addiction, snicker, when I try and think back to the beautiful VHS movies I rented, I remember being genuinely excited to watch the American Ninja's and the Universal Soldier. I mean I am a ninja now, so it would stand to reason that, I would enjoy ninja movies. Long before Austin Powers made the 'Judo Chop' famous, I perfected and used the 'Karate Chop', if you don't believe me ask my sisters.
I also watched another similar trailer recently, which was by my guess the third installment of Universal Solider, it had both Dolph Lundgren and Jean Claude in it, but also looked terrible. I ask the world using a remix of a Paula Coles song "Where have all the ninja's gone?" No more love stories in the middle I want Kung-fu and if there is a love story I want it to be between foot and face. I dedicate this particular post to Jean-Claude Van Damme's mullet and his completely unnecessary use of the splits to A) relax before a fight and B) avoid being electrocuted, although the latter is sometimes exceptable.

Good day to you!

Poop up the Stink!

Users beware, I'm a new man on a new mission, that mission is to pleasure your eyeballs........SEIZURE!!!! Tis the season of false promises, un-used gym memberships, and increased oral hygiene (to be followed by severely decrease OH).
My oath is to continue the awesome.
Wanna know what really grinds my gears, foremost the damn bus prices going up, as if mayor Bronco (yes his nickname is Bronco, and I believe he got elected because he looks good in a Cowboy hat) doesn't have enough Duckets to keep the transit running. Calgary transit is like a cable guy, never shows up when it is supposed to, smells funny, and you're almost guaranteed to see a butt crack (or two). I thought the idea of public transit was to facilitate congestion on city streets not make me wanna drive to work, Calgary's policy on carpooling/transit licks a knobgobblers cram hole.

Nextly, my dislike for public bathrooms must be discussed, I do not get why it is so fucking hard for people to flush the toilet, I understand looking at your poop is healthy, doctors always say "how does your stool look?" Why do I have to see somebody elses shit... It doesn't make sense.... there are three major steps in regard to going to the bathroom;

STEP1 Go to the bathroom
STEP2 wipe
STEP3 flush.

Even monkeys in little vests can figure that out.

The fuel from my energy drink is waning, I must depart with a nugget of knowledge.
In order to truly see yourself, you have to look in a mirror. -Dr. Phil
Duh Doctor Phil, it's pretty much the only way you can see yourself, I have three words for you, CUL-DE-SAC.


Recently, I was searching online for old black and white photos of Calgary downtown, specifically Steven Avenue area, and for some strange reason images of Stu Hart kept popping in, and this one really caught my eye. It has everything I ever wanted in a photo, a giant, cowboys, and someone that looks like Colonel Sanders. Shortly after this photo was taken Andre the Giant gave his patented chokehold to an unsuspecting steer, consequently he won the steer wrestling, and the hearts of Calgarians.

Drew says Good-bye.